Honestly, that's the most brilliant costume choice ever. If E.B. ever gets a brand new coat, I might just die.
Currently watching Deadwood Season 1 all over again for Rachel's sake, so that when we watch Season 3, she's not all "Who's that? Why did he do that? What's going on? Why are there no Cylons? Why isn't this set in space?", and then I won't have to punch her in the arm. Also currently uploading a thousand different CDs to iTunes so that if my apartment ever gets flooded, burglarized and burned down in the same day, whoever steals my computer will have an amazing music collection. At this moment my computer is making wheezing sounds, as though it were an geriatric bronchitis victim smoking seven packs a day, and every time I feed it a new CD, it hitches and bucks and then settles into a subtle vibrational pattern that causes me all sorts of concern. At this rate, I'll have more music than porn in the memory, but I'll lack the capacity to reach either libraries.
Kidding: I have no porn on my computer. I don't even know what you speak of when you mention this 'porn' thing. What kind of miscreant are you?
Stuff:
Currently watching Deadwood Season 1 all over again for Rachel's sake, so that when we watch Season 3, she's not all "Who's that? Why did he do that? What's going on? Why are there no Cylons? Why isn't this set in space?", and then I won't have to punch her in the arm. Also currently uploading a thousand different CDs to iTunes so that if my apartment ever gets flooded, burglarized and burned down in the same day, whoever steals my computer will have an amazing music collection. At this moment my computer is making wheezing sounds, as though it were an geriatric bronchitis victim smoking seven packs a day, and every time I feed it a new CD, it hitches and bucks and then settles into a subtle vibrational pattern that causes me all sorts of concern. At this rate, I'll have more music than porn in the memory, but I'll lack the capacity to reach either libraries.
Kidding: I have no porn on my computer. I don't even know what you speak of when you mention this 'porn' thing. What kind of miscreant are you?
Stuff:
1. The new Ween ("The Friends ep") is really gay; and I don't mean in the way that I usually describe really dumb things as gay, but in that "I Feel Free" happy hardcore, busting out the amyl nitrate while sucking on a pacifier with eight bare-chested firemen blowing whistles in time with the beat type of gay. What's more: it is TOTALLY FRIGGIN' AWESOME. In that way that Ween has of being awesome.
I'm sorry: Ween overshadows everything. Even the fact that former employers the Wee Book Inn had both Porno For Pyros CDs (hey, Perry Farrel didn't completely suck after Jane's Addiction...) plus Snoop Dogg's Rhythm & Gangsta and all three only cost me ten bucks. That's incredible, but Ween conquers ALL.
Hey, did you hear that Snoop's got a book of fiction out, and it's called Love Don't Live Here Anymore? I know! I'll bet good money you didn't know that 50 Cent's got one, too!
(What, you really need a joke after that?)
2. Speaking of wordish things: no, I haven't really given up on White Noise; it's pretty damned good, despite the fact that even the kids in this book are smarter than me (honestly: what ten-year-old boy questions the existential root of his motivations? I was happy questioning why Megatron would put up with Starscream's whining and scheming when I was ten...); it's just that I've finally got a copy of Palahniuk's Rant, and I'm excited, but I figure I gotta finish what's on my plate before I get to have dessert.
3. (This was gonna be a rather crude comment about my sex life, but I think everyone's tired of hearing about how I've finally been allowed to touch a member of the opposite sex; but: yay for me!)
4. I do not care about Harry Potter. No, really, I don't, so just SHUT UP about it, 'kay? 'kay...
5. Shellac is better than you. I only say that because Shellac is better than ME and clearly, I am better than YOU. Of course, while we're going with this stream of logic, Shellac is JUST AS GOOD as the Crazy Lady.
6. She paid me $10 to say that, which only proves that I will shill shamelessly for any price. Still: the Shellac IS that good.
That's all. The Beano Night Crew has been halved by summer vacations, leading to the creation of next summer's smash hit, Mormon and Jew: Where Are You?, shot on location in Italy, Vancouver, and a lost mountain range where we have to find a monkey who holds the secret to the location of our lost counterparts...but, no, I'm giving too much away as it is. Y'all have to pay top dollar for THIS adventure.
Yes, we are saddened by Josh and Jared's departure, and wish them a speedy and safe return. Josh: don't rupture anything while you're in Italy. Jared? Sleeping outside on the riverbank is NOT A GOOD IDEA.
Is it sad that I'm super-excited about my new toilet? I can't help it: it's been pretty much non-existant since January, and now the housing gods have blessed me with a new and improved version. Seriously, the guts of the old one are still in my garbage can. They did it all while I was at work, so it has the feel of magical plumbing elves installing a turbocharged engine of waste management in place of what was once a broken-down contraption of levers and pneumatic tubes. I can now defecate in modern gleaming comfort. If only they'd do something about the rotting drywall in the ceiling...
More later. I must go find pie, now...
I'm sorry: Ween overshadows everything. Even the fact that former employers the Wee Book Inn had both Porno For Pyros CDs (hey, Perry Farrel didn't completely suck after Jane's Addiction...) plus Snoop Dogg's Rhythm & Gangsta and all three only cost me ten bucks. That's incredible, but Ween conquers ALL.
Hey, did you hear that Snoop's got a book of fiction out, and it's called Love Don't Live Here Anymore? I know! I'll bet good money you didn't know that 50 Cent's got one, too!
(What, you really need a joke after that?)
2. Speaking of wordish things: no, I haven't really given up on White Noise; it's pretty damned good, despite the fact that even the kids in this book are smarter than me (honestly: what ten-year-old boy questions the existential root of his motivations? I was happy questioning why Megatron would put up with Starscream's whining and scheming when I was ten...); it's just that I've finally got a copy of Palahniuk's Rant, and I'm excited, but I figure I gotta finish what's on my plate before I get to have dessert.
3. (This was gonna be a rather crude comment about my sex life, but I think everyone's tired of hearing about how I've finally been allowed to touch a member of the opposite sex; but: yay for me!)
4. I do not care about Harry Potter. No, really, I don't, so just SHUT UP about it, 'kay? 'kay...
5. Shellac is better than you. I only say that because Shellac is better than ME and clearly, I am better than YOU. Of course, while we're going with this stream of logic, Shellac is JUST AS GOOD as the Crazy Lady.
6. She paid me $10 to say that, which only proves that I will shill shamelessly for any price. Still: the Shellac IS that good.
That's all. The Beano Night Crew has been halved by summer vacations, leading to the creation of next summer's smash hit, Mormon and Jew: Where Are You?, shot on location in Italy, Vancouver, and a lost mountain range where we have to find a monkey who holds the secret to the location of our lost counterparts...but, no, I'm giving too much away as it is. Y'all have to pay top dollar for THIS adventure.
Yes, we are saddened by Josh and Jared's departure, and wish them a speedy and safe return. Josh: don't rupture anything while you're in Italy. Jared? Sleeping outside on the riverbank is NOT A GOOD IDEA.
Is it sad that I'm super-excited about my new toilet? I can't help it: it's been pretty much non-existant since January, and now the housing gods have blessed me with a new and improved version. Seriously, the guts of the old one are still in my garbage can. They did it all while I was at work, so it has the feel of magical plumbing elves installing a turbocharged engine of waste management in place of what was once a broken-down contraption of levers and pneumatic tubes. I can now defecate in modern gleaming comfort. If only they'd do something about the rotting drywall in the ceiling...
More later. I must go find pie, now...
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