My daughter can't stop touching herself. There, I said it.
No, really - the moment we've got the diaper off, her hand heads straight for her cooch, and I die a little inside each time. It's like she's got no sense of modesty, and she's already 5 months old - I fear for an existence spent entirely chugging heroin beers at ringside for Wrestlemania, except for those brief interludes when she's resisting arrest for urinating on cops or something equally as classy...
...and speaking of classy:
1. So help me God, this is probably the only thing that people are gonna remember from this upcoming U.S. election (unless, of course, the pundits on both sides are right, and a) Obama wins and then promptly gets assassinated, or b) McCain wins and promptly dies of old age, both options filling me with an eerie sense of calm dread...): the Sarah Palin-inspired adult release, aptly named Nailin' Paylin, and the dildo shaped like Obama's head.
It's like...well, I don't know what it's like. It just makes me a little sad, y'know?
2. Oh, and then there's Ashley Todd, who beat herself up, carved a backwards 'B' into her cheek and then told police that a black Obama supporter did it to her. Nice.
3. More class for ya: newlyweds tasered at their own wedding and reception.
I had more, but the HILJ is currently attempting to chew her way through the hardwood floor, and her mother will kill me if Hazel gets a splinter. Here's German Bert & Ernie lecturing you about smoking just to give your day that added dose of surrealism. Don't say I don't love you.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
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2 comments:
Hey, those ringside tickets for WrestleMania can be hard to get...
Not if you flash your cooch to the security guards...
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